Complaining or content?

Are you complaining or content?

Good question—the answer is probably, “about what?” as if complaining were a human right! There’s a difference between ordinary complaining and the complaint that accompanies lament.

There’s something uncomfortably honest about Paul’s words in Philippians 2: “Do all things without grumbling or disputing” (v. 14). It’s a command (or an ‘imperative’, if that makes the medicine go down easier!) that often makes us squirm because, if we’re honest, it hits close to home. Complaining is something we might excel at, and it can become second nature—we do it without even thinking. Life (not God) gives us plenty of reasons to grumble: work stress, relationship drama, the general chaos of the world around us. But when Paul tells us to resist complaining, he’s inviting us into something deeper than just “putting on a happy face.” He’s calling us to a heart shift, to live in a way that transforms not only us but also the world around us. The encouragement in Romans 8:28—”all things work together for good”—is not always a go-to verse for cultivating a healthy perspective and attitude.

The quiet whisper of discontent
Complaining is rarely loud at first. It’s more like a murmur that starts small—a slight annoyance with your job, the way your spouse does that one thing, the traffic on the way home. Before we know it, that quiet whisper of dissatisfaction grows into full-blown grumbling. But what’s really happening when we complain? It’s not just about venting; it’s a heart issue. We’ve fully engaged! When dealing with the challenges of life, underneath the surface, complaining says, “God, I don’t trust You in this.” We may not intend to say that (and probably won’t), but that’s what complaining does—it reveals a heart that doubts God’s goodness in the moment. Where is God in this? Why me? Why this moment, this place, this time?

And that’s where Paul steps in and challenges us: “For it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure” (Phil. 2:13). God isn’t distant, uninvolved, or absent in those frustrating, daily grind moments. He’s there, shaping us, refining us, and yes, even using the things that irritate us to draw us closer to Him. Our ‘God-radar’ is turned off, and we feel all alone. Or so we think.

Finding God in the frustrations
Let’s be real: not complaining isn’t easy. It’s one thing to say, “I’m going to stop grumbling,” but quite another to live it out when life is frustrating. That colleague who always pushes your buttons? The long queue at the shop where the till is malfunctioning when you’re already late? These moments feel trivial, but they’re precisely the places where God is inviting us to stop, pause, and see Him at work.

Paul understood this better than most. When he wrote these words to the church, he was imprisoned, his future uncertain, and yet, instead of sinking into bitterness, he wrote about joy! His peace wasn’t tied to a change in his circumstances, but to a deep-rooted trust that God was in control, even when life didn’t make sense. That’s the same invitation we’re given—to trust that God is with us in both the small annoyances and the bigger struggles.

The high cost of grumbling
Here’s the thing about complaining—it’s more contagious than COVID. It doesn’t just affect you; it impacts those around you too. Paul wasn’t just concerned with our individual holiness but with the witness of the Church as a whole. He says we are meant to be “blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world” (Phil. 2:15). Our response to frustration speaks volumes to a watching world.

Think about it.
We live in a culture where complaining is almost a way of life. It’s woven into conversations about everything from the weather to politics, and dare I say it—even the life and activities of the Church. But what if, instead, we met frustration with gratitude? Difficult, yes. What if, instead of venting, we chose patience? People would notice, because it’s so different from what they expect, and that’s the point. When we choose contentment over complaint, we’re reflecting something much bigger than ourselves. We’re shining the light of Christ.

Not just a feeling, but a choice
Contentment doesn’t just magically appear—it isn’t a fruit of the Spirit, but it is a work of the Spirit in us as we grow in Him. It’s something we learn, often through the hard and frustrating moments of life. The amusing Greek word for grumbling, goggusmos (γογγυσμός), points to a kind of murmuring or dissatisfaction that bubbles and froths like a shaken can of soda, just under the surface. It’s sneaky, devious, malicious, but it’s also something we can address, especially with prayer. Gratitude is the antidote, and it’s a practice—one that doesn’t ignore the hard stuff but chooses to see God’s hand at work, even when it’s hard to understand.

Paul’s life was a testimony to this. Despite everything he went through—beatings, imprisonments, threats to his life—he found a way to intentionally praise God. It wasn’t because his circumstances were easy; it was because he knew the One who was sovereign over the church he was speaking to. We’re invited to share in that same trust. To believe that even when life is messy, annoying, and frustrating, God is present. He’s working for our good, and He’s using those very moments to shape us.

A different kind of witness
Living without complaint isn’t just about personal growth—it’s a powerful witness to the world. It says, “My hope isn’t in perfect circumstances; it’s in a perfect God.” And when we stop grumbling and start trusting, we become a living, vibrant, and relevant testimony to God’s grace.

Imagine what would happen if, instead of joining in with the chorus of complaints at work or at home, we chose gratitude. It’s not about ignoring the hard stuff, but about letting people see that our peace doesn’t come from having it all together—it comes from knowing the One who holds it all together.

This week, take the challenge. When that difficult situation comes—and it will—choose to pause. Ask yourself, “How can I respond in a way that reflects the peace and joy of Christ?” You might just find that, as you make that choice, your heart begins to shift. Life will still be hard at times, but you’ll start to see it differently—as an opportunity to trust God more deeply and to reflect His love more brightly to those around you.

Our contentment is found not in the absence of frustration but in the presence of a God who is always at work in the midst of it. And as always, trusting God will lead to a heart of gratitude that dispels grumbling!